In Everyone's Belly Button, is a Little Bit of Cum

Now, how this statement came about, is really irrelevant. BUT while sailing on a catamaran for two weeks, with a lot of time to lounge around and soak up the sun, and have random thoughts running through my head, I realized, that I believe that statement to be 95% true.

I mean, "everyone" might be a bit of an exaggeration. There's exceptions to that: celibate people, those who just don't like sex, the really young/old extremes may have a less likely chance of it - but still not excluded... lesbians? them I'm not sure about, but anyway, pretty much everyone.

AND I'm not talking about massive amounts. I'm gonna assume the average joe who has the average amount of sex, has still got some. Not a noticeable amount, but if you CSI DNA swabbed that shit, 95%. Yup! it'd be present. True story.

And I welcome ALL arguments. Please prove me wrong! Tell me why you disagree. But I really doubt it. That's right people. It's all about equality. We're all in this together. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Let's just embrace it.

I saw a female comedian at a festival once. She started off her set by looking around at all the girls and simply saying "Ladies, let's just think bout something for a second.... We put penises in our mouths" ... .... ... .... ... .... ... .... ... .... Then She was silent. That all she needed to say, and the girls just looked from one another, acknowledging that statement in silent affirmation.

And that's what I want you to do now, friends. Just think about it, for a second... ... .... .... ..... ... .... ... .... ... ..... In everyone's bellybutton, is a little bit of cum. Am i wrong?

Why Don't You Just Settle Down?

I read something the other day captioned "Don't Settle, Do What's Right For You". Without even realizing it, those word got to me. Hours later, I was thinking about this word: SETTLE. Let's discuss.

Ever since the early stages of life, this word has had a negative connotation. "Settle Down". "Calm Down". Seriously! If it wasn't for your parents, it was your teachers. And what did they really mean? It wasn't encouragement for you to continue what you were doing. Singling, dancing, socializing with your friends, having fun! It was a demand! At conforming! Sit down. Shut up. Listen up. "I am 'the man', and you will obey me".

Fastforward to teenage and adult life. You start dating, you always go after the jerks, you want to belong, but you get treated like shit. And the advice you get? "He wasn't good enough for you! Don't settle for that!" I'd like to believe that's the reason I've mainly been single. That no ones managed to impress me enough to give them a chance. But that's probably not it. Do I settle? Maybe,

But now, haha, welcome to your 30's! And the questions crushing your spirits: "Why haven't you settled down yet?". "You should get a career, and settle down". I just want to yell at these people. Because I'm a rebel and I do what I want! I won't do it. I won't have a house and 2.5 kids - 'because that's what a well behaved girl my age should do'. I'm gonna wait, for that head over heels love to find me instead of settling for mediocrity. And how 'bout I continue living my life in the mean time? If that means singing, dancing, traveling, and being naked while I do it, then cheers!

So when you talk so fondly of having "settled down" please excuse me that I don't have those warm gushy feelings exploding from me. It's never been a positive before!